Fake swearing

Battlestar Galactica is easily the best show ever. I'm not usually a huge scifi fan, but if the storylines and characters are good, I can overlook the space fighting and space hookers.

I'm partway through season two, and the only fly in the ointment so far is the incessant fake swearing. Instead of saying "fuck", the characters say "frak", but they use it in the exact same way. Examples: "frak you", "did you frak her?", and "don't frak with me!".

I appreciate what they're trying to accomplish, I really do. But the word "frak" so closely resembles the queen of all swear words that it only brings attention to itself. They should've picked a completely dissimilar word, like "snarg" or "joink", so the viewers would forget that writers wish they could pen the F word, but can't.

Click here to read an interesting article about swearing.

Open letter to an anonymous work vendor

Dear [Manufacturer Name],

I hate you. So much. Not only is your catalog woefully inadequate, but you are forcing me to research sports and sporting equipment in order to figure out what exactly one would want to know before purchasing said equipment. I don't care if most tennis balls are pressurized or unpressurized, and I don't want to learn the standard size of footballs. I want you to tell me what size your footballs are so I can put that information in the specs and forget that football even exists. Do a better job, [Manufacturer Name]. People want to know what stuff is made of and what size it is before they buy it sight-unseen via the internet.

On a personal note, the day I buy one of your products is the day I visit a Dunkin' Donuts.*

Suck it,

A Harried Copywriter at [Company Name]

*Confession: I got a Dunkin' Donuts coffee coolatta in a pinch at the Manchester airport a few weeks ago and am sorry I know how delicious they are.

Haiku to my new office chair

Cushy seat, firm back.

Much anticipated; I

appreciate you.