Fake swearing

Battlestar Galactica is easily the best show ever. I'm not usually a huge scifi fan, but if the storylines and characters are good, I can overlook the space fighting and space hookers.

I'm partway through season two, and the only fly in the ointment so far is the incessant fake swearing. Instead of saying "fuck", the characters say "frak", but they use it in the exact same way. Examples: "frak you", "did you frak her?", and "don't frak with me!".

I appreciate what they're trying to accomplish, I really do. But the word "frak" so closely resembles the queen of all swear words that it only brings attention to itself. They should've picked a completely dissimilar word, like "snarg" or "joink", so the viewers would forget that writers wish they could pen the F word, but can't.

Click here to read an interesting article about swearing.

Open letter to an anonymous work vendor

Dear [Manufacturer Name],

I hate you. So much. Not only is your catalog woefully inadequate, but you are forcing me to research sports and sporting equipment in order to figure out what exactly one would want to know before purchasing said equipment. I don't care if most tennis balls are pressurized or unpressurized, and I don't want to learn the standard size of footballs. I want you to tell me what size your footballs are so I can put that information in the specs and forget that football even exists. Do a better job, [Manufacturer Name]. People want to know what stuff is made of and what size it is before they buy it sight-unseen via the internet.

On a personal note, the day I buy one of your products is the day I visit a Dunkin' Donuts.*

Suck it,

A Harried Copywriter at [Company Name]

*Confession: I got a Dunkin' Donuts coffee coolatta in a pinch at the Manchester airport a few weeks ago and am sorry I know how delicious they are.

Haiku to my new office chair

Cushy seat, firm back.

Much anticipated; I

appreciate you.

Jack Attack: The Art of Aggression in Business

I spend 40 hours of my week here at work, so since I'm on a roll I am going to make some career-specific resolutions.


I resolve to:

• Be more confident, Jack Donaghy style.

• Find a comfortable desk chair. This has long been my biggest gripe with my otherwise stellar employer and if I had ample back support I'd be (even more!) cheerful and productive. I tried sitting on a yoga ball for awhile, but it lost air too quickly and pumping it up was disruptive. I'm waiting on my new desk chair to arrive but if that doesn't pass muster I shall spare no expense and provide myself with a pleasurable sitting experience.

• Witness a kitty fight. Our new building looks out over an empty lot and I often see stray cats roaming around. I'd love to see an adorable cat fight, or maybe even just a cat caucus. I realize that this is beyond my control, but I shall be diligent in monitoring their goings-on.

A drama-free '09

Making New Year's resolutions is kind of unoriginal, but I still love doing it. It's an excuse to flesh out some goals, reassess one's life and strive for positive change.

My general resolution is to make 2009 more awesome than 2008, which won't be too difficult because 2008 ended in a very un-awesome fashion. My specific resolutions are as follows:

• Run! I started running last week and put myself on a training schedule of sorts so as not to give up out of boredom. I plan on running Chicago's half marathon in September with a friend (or at least the 5K). Posting these goals here will shame me into actually completing it or at least not giving up until September.
  
  
• Try something new as often as possible and at least once a week. Big new things are preferable, but even minor changes like driving a new route to work or trying a new restaurant are acceptable. I might list my new things here for accountability and more of the shame factor.

Group activity: Post your resolutions in the comments section, or tell me why you think making resolutions is lame.

Open Letter to My Next-Door Neighbor

Dear Right-Side Neighbor,

Look, man, I don't know what it's like on the West Side, but here on the East Side we do not accuse our neighbors of stealing. I'm sorry that someone snagged your Nascar memorabilia or extra-hold hair gel, but that does not give you license to inspect my packages to make sure that they are in fact addressed to me.

If only there were some sort of tracking system or way to confirm delivery. As soon as they invent something of the sort maybe you'll stop giving me the side-eye.

Regards,

Your Left-Side Neighbor

Oh clementine

I wasn't planning on buying clemmies when I set out on my weekly grocery shopping trip -- not that I was opposed, per se-- but I couldn't NOT buy these.



It's like they were marketed specifically to me. So cute.

Conflicting stories

I saw these covers side-by-side in the grocery store this evening. Since these magazines are equally reputable, I just don't know what to believe!




Maybe he apologized after he told her to shut up? Perhaps we'll never know. Sigh.

Eggplant Cannelloni

I made this for dinner for some lovely ladies a few weeks ago (I'm a little behind posting--I've been so busy, what with all the vegging on the couch and such). I stretched it to serve three, but really would be best for just two. Clearly I have a fixation with all things goat cheese, so found this to be delicious.

The only time-consuming part was making the sauce, so if you're in a hurry you could probably just use some pre-made stuff and it would still be pretty tasty.



Ingredients

-1 tablespoon olive oil
-4 large shallots, sliced
-4 cloves garlic
-1 jar (12 oz) roasted red peppers, drained
-1 can diced tomato
-Juice of 1 orange (about 1/2 cup)
-2 medium eggplants, cut lengthwise into 1/2-inch slices
-Olive oil cooking spray
-4 oz goat cheese
-4 oz ricotta cheese
-about 4 tablespoons chopped fresh basil

Directions
-Heat oil in a medium skillet over medium heat.
-Cook shallots and garlic until soft, about 1 minute. Reduce heat. Cook until golden, 3 to 5 minutes.
-Add peppers, tomatoes & juice; bring to a boil. Lower heat; simmer until peppers are soft, about 5 minutes. Cool.
-Puree in a blender. Pour into a 9" x 13" baking dish.
-Coat eggplants with cooking spray and broil on a baking sheet until golden on both sides, about 15 minutes.
-Heat oven to 400°F. Mash both cheeses and basil in a bowl.
-Place 1 tablespoon of filling at the end of each eggplant slice; roll up & secure with toothpick. Lay seam side down in dish.
- Bake 10 to 15 minutes.

Modified from epicurious.com

My first tagging

I was tagged by one of my favorite bloggers, the delightful Annie at Well, that would be telling.

Seven Interesting (well, I think) Facts About Me

1. I won't walk around my house without my pink fuzzy slippers (I have two pairs).

2. I am re-reading all 30+ books by L.M. Montgomery, the author of Anne of Green Gables, and am going to read her journals next.

3. I have mad detective skills.

4. I don't like being the center of attention, but my secret wish is to be on the Amazing Race. Actually, I'd prefer Survivor, but I hate being cold and hungry, so Amazing Race would be a more appropriate choice.

5. I eat the same exact snack every weekday-- green pepper & hummus at 10:30 AM.

6. I wear a retainer at night.

7. I am searching for purple accent pillows for my green couch and won't stop until I find just the right ones.

I tag:

Amanda at Click. The Good News
Meghan at Joy Through Cooking
Sarah at The Good Wife
Suzanne at Ramblings of a Rambunctious Toddler
Not Laura Ingalls at Little Apartment in the Suburbs
Meshaliu at Knitting & Kitties
GrumpyMomma at GrumpyMomma's Blog

Mom's Turkey Zucchini Soup

If I were a character in the movie Waitress (which was actually awful, but I liked the way she named her pies according to her life situation), I'd call this Single Livin' Soup. Now that it's just me in the house, I've been making big pots of soup on Monday nights. That way, I have enough leftover to bring for lunch for the next three days. It gets a little tedious, but the convenience factor makes up for it, and who doesn't love warm, hearty soup in cold weather?



Mom's Turkey Zucchini Soup

Ingredients

-1 lb ground turkey
-1/2 bag frozen corn
-1 small can diced green chili peppers
-1 can black beans (optional, and I did not add them this time so they're not in the photo)
-1 can chicken stock
-2 yellow squashes (because they're usually small), chopped
-1 large zucchini, chopped
-1 tablespoon cumin
-1 tablespoon salt
-1 tablespoon pepper
-1 tablespoon oregano
-1 tablespoon cornstarch

Directions

-Brown the ground turkey and drain any juices. Add spices and green chili peppers. Add beans and cook for 10 minutes.
-Add chicken stock, corn, squash and zucchini and cook for about 30 minutes or until squash is soft and cooked through.

Source: My mom

Mascarpone Cupcakes

For some reason, nothing makes me happier than making cupcakes. If I could just bake cupcakes all day, life would be complete.

These cupcakes are tops. The mascarpone cheese made them incredibly moist (shudder... I hate that word) and spongy. I tried to make the strawberry glaze, but it came out tasting a little strange -- I blame the strawberries and not my culinary efforts. I was short on time so busted over to Kroger for some store-bought icing but I'm sure these would be even better with something homemade.

Mascarpone Cupcakes



Ingredients

- 8 ounces mascarpone cheese (1 cup), softened
- 2 egg whites
- 1/4 cup vegetable oil
- 1 box white cake mix
- 1 cup water

For the Aforementioned Failed Strawberry Glaze
- 1/3 cup frozen strawberries, thawed and drained
- 2 1/2 cups powdered sugar

Directions

- Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Line your cupcake tins with paper liners.

- In a large bowl combine the mascarpone cheese, egg whites and vegetable oil. Using a hand mixer, beat the ingredients until combined and creamy.
- Add the cake mix and water and mix until smooth, about 3 minutes. Fill the cups to just below the rim and bake until puffed and golden, about 18 to 20 minutes.
- Remove from the oven, let cool slightly in the tin then transfer the cupcakes to a wire rack.
- Meanwhile, puree the strawberries in a blender or small food processor. Place the powdered sugar in a medium bowl. Pour in the strawberry puree and whisk until smooth. Top the cooled cupcakes with the strawberry glaze. Run to the grocery store for backup icing in case the glaze doesn't work out.

Source
Giada De Laurentis

Niche products get jump on the Holidays

Awhile back I ordered some nail caps for my cat so that she wouldn't scratch up the new couch. In place of declawing, you can glue a plastic cap on each nail to protect your furniture (and skin and eyes, I suppose). This is more humane, but also too much work if you're as lazy as I, so I offered Cricket a cardboard scratch pad instead and that seems to keep her off the upholstery. I still get "Mewsletters" from the makers of Soft Paws (TM) whenever they come out with exciting advances in plastic caps -- usually, new colors.

'Tis the season for Holiday marketing, because this was in my inbox this afternoon:



I was really disappointed that there were no Chanukah or Kwanzaa caps.

Sun-Dried Tomato Goat Cheese Cups

These are super tasty, insanely easy to make, and look fancy -- the perfect party food. I could eat like 12 myself, but slap some goat cheese on anything and I'm in.



Ingredients

-30 pre-made mini phyllo cups (I can find packs of 15 in the frozen section at Kroger)
-8 oz goat cheese, preferably w/ herbs
-5 oz diced sun-dried tomatoes

Directions

-Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
-Thoroughly mix goat cheese and tomatoes, then fill each pre-made phyllo cup to the top with the mixture.
- Bake 10 - 15 minutes.

Guns, Guts and Gorgeous

I saw this bumper sticker at a wedding last weekend and just had to take a photo (people must've thought I was either insanely pro-Palin or very anti).



Now, no matter what your political leanings, are those really good reasons to vote for someone?